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1865. 



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TO 

A Y\"IDE CIRCLE 

OF BEREAVED FRIENDS, 

AND TO THOSE ESPECIALLY 

WHOSE KIND MINISTRIES OF LOVE 

HAVE BEEN SHARED BY THE 

DEPARTED AND HER FAMILY, 

THIS MEMORIAL 

IS 

INSCRIBED. 



MEMORIAL. 



Qrace Welch Barnes was born at West Brookfield, 
Mass., July 12, 1789. Her parents, Thomas and Elizabeth 
Barnes, were persons of eminent piety, and trained their 
seven children in the truths and practice of religion. They, 
and their parents also, were active promoters of Christian 
enterprise, and cheerfully gave of their property to the main- 
tenance of the institutions of the gospel. The site where 
now the Congregational meeting-house stands, facing the 
beautiful green at West Brookfield, was a gift of this family 
to the parish. Not a few of the pastors of this ancient 
church, founded a century and half ago, have had reason to 
rejoice in their helpful sympathy and co-operation through 
many generations down to the present time. 

In her early life, Grace was characterized by a quiet, 
dignified demeanor, which secured for her the respect as well 
as love of those who knew her. One of her early associates, 
still living, speaks of her as being " very amiable and devot- 
edly pious," and recalls the impressions which the uniform 
correctness of her deportment then made upon her mind, 



4 MEMOBIAL. 

more than fifty years ago. She witnessed the propriety of 
her daily life not only abroad, but in the familiar inter- 
course of the household, and remembers distinctly the 
restraint which her presence imposed when she was prompted 
to undue freedom of remark. 

March 4th, 1817, she was united in marriage, at West 
Brookfield, to Thomas Thwing. In 1824, they removed to 
Ware, and there remained till 1837. In both places, they 
were welcomed as efficient laborers in the Church and 
benevolent enterprises of the day. The first Sabbath School 
in West B.ookfleld was formed in their house. Female 
prayer meetings, circles of prayer Sabbath evenings and at 
five o'clock in the morning, were held there before a church 
edifice was erected. On removing to Boston in 1837, a still 
larger field of labor was opened to both husband and wife. 
Though an invalid, she was ever at work. Tract visitors, 
missionaries, students and clergymen often shared her 
hospitalities for a longer or shorter time, besides the various 
benevolent societies of Salem Church, which frequently met 
with, and were entertained by her. But of these labors and 
of her last hours, the address which follows will more fully 
treat. 







&&^K**f***& 




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THE FUNERAL SERVICES 

took place on Saturday afternoon, September 2nd. Prayer 
was ottered at her late residence, and the body was taken 
to the meeting-house, corner of Salem and North Bennet 
streets. After an appropriate organ voluntary, the following 
hymn was sung by a select choir, led by Barna S. Snow, Esq., 
of Boston : 

Asleep in Jesus, blessed sleep ! 
From which none ever wake to weep : 
A calm and undisturbed repose, 
Unbroken by the last of foes. 

Asleep in Jesus, oh, how sweet 

To be for such a slumber meet 1 

With holy confidence to sing 

That death has lost its venomed sting. 

Asleep in Jesus, peaceful rest f 
Whose waking is supremely blest ; 
No fear, no woe shall dim that hour 
That manifests the Saviour's power. 



Asleep in Jesus ! oh, forme 

May such a bliftsful refuge be! 

Becurelv shall my ashes lie, 

And wait the summons from on high. 



6 MEMORIAL. 

Rev. S. T. Fay, acting pastor of Salem Church, then read, 

I AM TILL EtESTTRRECTIOa AND THE LlFE, saith the 

Lord : he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet 
shall hu live, and whoso liveth and believeth in me, shall 
never die. I know that my Redeemer liveth, and that he 
shall stand upon the earth ; and though after my skin worms 
destroy this body, yet in my flesh shall I see God. 

I heard a voice from heaven, saying unto me, write ; from 
henceforth blessed are the dead who die in the Lord ; even 
so, saith the Spirit, for they rest from their labors and their 
works do follow them. * * * * * 

Behold thy Mother ! She hath brought up children, 
she hath lodged strangers, she hath washed the saints' feet, 
she hath relieved the afflicted, she hath diligently followed 
every good work ; grave, sober, faithful in all things. The 
heart of her husband did safely trust in her, and her children 
rise up and call her blessed. She stretched out her hands to 
the poor, yea, she reached out her hands to the needy. She 
looked well to the ways of her own household, and ate not 
the bread of idleness. Her candle went not out by night. 
She opened her mouth with wisdom, and in her tongue was 
the law of kindness. * * * * * When the ear heard 
her, it blessed her. When the eye saw her, it gave witness. 
The blessing of him that was ready to perish came on her, 
and she caused the widow's heart to sing for joy. The 
memory of the just is blessed ! Wherefore, comfort ye one 
another with these words. 



ADDRESS 



ItY REV. S. P. FAY. 



It is not with sorrow that We are assembled for these 
obsequies. There are no tears in recalling the fact that she, 
who had more than measured the appointed span of life, who 
had almost entered upon her fourscore years, and who had 
for years waited for death, has at length been released from 
the burden, from the prison, from the body of this death. 
We cannot mourn that her imprisoned soul, at last set free, 
has flown away to heaven. Shall we mourn that the assiduity, 
which, with unwearied tenderness waited on her feebleness, 
and which she tenderly recognized with responsive affection, 
is now at last relieved ? 

No ; let us rather rejoice that the mortal has put on 
immortality, and that it only remains for us to bury in the 
bosom of its kindred earth this lifeless clay, from which the 
freed soul has gone to be with Christ. In this death there is 
no extinction of hope, no interruption of activity, no anguish 
of bereaved affection, and better than all, no awful questioning 
whether the departed was ready. Our tears are only those 
of love, of gratitude, and of homage to a blessed memory. 
11 Thanks be to God which giveth us the victory through our 
Lord Jesus Christ." This death is but the soul awaking 
from its long and restless sleep to its young and vigorous 
immortality. Hence, we have not a tear to shed for her who 
has gone to be forever with the Lord. She had long been 
looking for and expecting death, although at last it came 
suddenly. Her last sickness was short, and without any 



8 MEMOKIAL OF 

marked features of interest, to which we may now refer. But 
we have what was far better, a long and beautiful life ! 

The larger portion of her six and seventy years was given 
to the service of her Redeemer. Born of an honored and 
pious ancestry, trained in her girlhood by watchful parents, 
instructed not only in the elements of a solid education, 
domestic and secular, but in the truths of religion, she early 
became a Christian. She joined the Congregational Church, 
West Brookheld, fifty-five years ago. She has been a mem- 
ber of this (Salem) Church since 1838, From the records 
of the church committee I find that her Christian experience 
was clear and decided. Her conviction of personal sinfulness 
seems to have been painfully vivid. She compared her 
distress on account of it to the raging of the sea before 
Jesus came into the ship to his disciples ; but afterwards 
followed a great calm, that calm which so distinguished her 
whole Christian life and gave her that cheerfulness and 
patience for which she was characterized. In less than three 
years alter her marriage, she and her husband accepted an 
appointment from the American Board, to labor among the 
Cherokee Indians. But sickness prevented her entering upon 
that work. The labors of her husband and her own, as well 
as those of her children, were to be put forth here, " beginning 
at Jerusalem."' Her home has been with us for nearly thirty 
years. Her life has been intimately connected with Salem 
Church. Although in feeble health, she has not been idle. 
Her active usefulness has been manifested through the Mater- 
nal and other Associations, and in entertaining numerous 
guests at her house. She was of unspeakable blessing to her 
family. If these two "Sisters of Charity" have been of 
service to the community and the church, if this only son 
has been an honor to the ministry, if this husband has been 
able to endure hard labor with but small remuneration, and 
yet keep faith in God and sustain a cheerful spirit, they all 
owe it largely to her ceaseless prayers, wise counsels and 
hopeful spirit. 

In May, 1863, this honored mother in Israel seemed very 
near her end, even in sight of the gates of the Celestial 
City. She then went through her immediate conflict with 



I 



MBS. OBAC1 W. THWINO. U 

death. She conversed cheerfully with her famil] about her 

departure, and "gave commandment concerning her bones.' 1 

unexpectedly to herself and others, she recovered her 

Btrength in a good measure, bo els to be able occasionally to 

OOme to this Banctuary, which has been for BO many \ 

her place of worship. Four weeks ago she heard a sermon 
from a former beloved pastor, Rev. Joseph II. Town'-, I). I)., 
upon the resurrection of the body and that future life 
upon which she has now so triumphantly entered. She 
enjoyed this last discourse exceedingly, little thinking how- 
near that life was to her; but on Thursday morning last, 
(August 31st. 1865,) after but four days 1 confinement to her 
room, unexpectedly to all she passed away and entered upon 
a glorious immortality. And now, 

11 After life's fitful fever Bhe Bleeps well." 

She has gone to join her family, of which she was the 
■nth and the last to go over the flood. 
Of her last moments there is little to be said. But one of 
her children was with her when she was seized with her last 
sickness, the other two being in Maine. She expressed 
great joy that her absent son reached home the afternoon 
before she departed. He offered prayer and conversed with 
her enough to know that she had no fears of death. After 
prayer he repeated to her a part of the hymn beginning : 

" I am waiting by the river, 
I ;im watching by the shore; 
Only waiting for the boatman. 

Soon he'll come and bear me o'er." 

During most of Wednesday night her reason was clouded, 
and her articulation almost unintelligible. At two o'clock 
Thursday morning she fell into a quiet sleep, from which, 
without pain, at six o'clock, she entered the saint's everlast- 
ing rest. 

" Bhe paascd thro' morning's golden gate, 
And walked in 1'arad . - 

Her husband, younger daughter and only son were with 
her as she breathed her last. The latter closed her eyes and 



10 MEMORIAL OF 

broke the silence of the chamber of death by repeating that 
triumphant doxology of Paul which such a scene must 
elicit : " thanks be to god who givetji us the victoxy 

THROUGH OUR LORD JESUS CHRIST." 

Her loving nature and her habitual nearness to God, her 
constant cheerfulness and hopefulness, her wisdom and pru- 
dence, her patience under increasing bodily infirmities — 
virtues which only the grace of God enabled her to illustrate — 
are a rich legacy for her children. Tenderly and devoutly 
did she feel in her old age that God had blessed her all the 
days of her life. How much she loved her husband and 
children, and how tenderly they loved her, all who know 
them will testify. 

Our faith now beholds her entering into that great glory, 
to realize there the full fruition of that hope, " I shall be 
satisfied when I awake in thy likeness." 

My Dear Brother, There is no need I should address 
much in way of consolation to you. You will, it is true, 
miss the wife of your youth and the mother of your children, 
with whom you have walked hand in hand and heart in heart 
these forty-eight years. She has indeed strengthened your 
hands when you have been ready to faint. By her economy 
and labor, she has been an invaluable help. But you, who 
have so often comforted others, know well the sources of 
consolation. I know the everlasting arms will be around 
you, and that you will soon be with her ! 

This only Son, and these affectionate Daughters tenderly 
mourn their loss. But religion has taught you to appreciate 
the privilege of having such a mother. The prayers she 
offered for you, from the first hour of your lives to the 
day of her departure ; the example of faith and cheerful 
Christian devotedness she set before you ; and her instruc- 
tive words, are hallowed in your memories. She has 
now led the way to glory. You have now a mother in 
heaven, who tenderly watches your labors and struggles ! 
May you follow her when your work is completed. May 
your last end be like hers ! 

Farewell, sacred relics of a loved and honored wife and 
mother! May your sleep be peaceful and undisturbed until 



m ELS. OB \< I w . i 11 WING. 11 

the last trumpet Bhall call you to the assembly of the just. 
There we Bhall meet you, — not as qow, cold, lifeless, and 
corruptible, bul vital in every part. And thou, immortal 

Spirit, farewell! death has but taken thee aside and uni 

, that, being washed and sanctified and justified, Q 

may robe thee anew and get thee ready to join with us the 

glorious retinue of Christ in his day of triumph ! Farewell, 

rill ( iod thee to us ! 

After prayer the choir sung the hymn beginning 

11 Sweet is the Bcene when Christiana die," 

to the tunc " Federal Street." Friends present then had the 
opportunity of looking on the serene, pleasant face of the 
departed. Flowers of richest fragrance were scattered within 
and without the coffin, and others adorned the pulpit. These 
ted fitting, rather than funeral mourning, for she had 
forever passed from the land of the dying, and joyously entered 
the land of the living. The inscription on the coffin read, 

(&vntt W. Owing. 

AGEB 7Q YEARS. 

-A. S X. E E F I 3ST JESXJS. 






SERVICES AT MOUNT AUBURN. 

The remains, followed by the family and friends, reached 
Mount Auburn at half past four. The slant rays of a warm 
September sun played through the branches of the waving 
elms, the walnut, and the linden trees, as we bore the 
precious dust to its final resting place. The family lot is 
on Arethusa path, No. 3307. There devout and loving 
hands had brought her to her burial, but never did a burial 
seem less associated with gloom. Leaning on his staff, and 
on the friendly arm of his pastor, the aged father, with his 
children and grand- children about him, stood by the dead ; 
while a quartette of sweet voices, sung to the tune " Heber," 

u There is a land of pure delight 
Where saints immortal reign. " 

The calm face of the departed saint, which was turned 
towards the voices led by her son, seemed clothed with the 
sweetness and peace of sleep, or as if she were listening 
again to the sounds which she loved on earth to hear so 
well. But beyond those autumnal skies her spirit had 
passed to be forever with the Lord. As we sung of 

" Sweet fields beyond the swelling flood," 

and as our eyes took in the delightful prospect before us, the 



m i Mi»i;i \i,. I ;; 

d meadows, the flowing Charles, and the villa 
beyond the river, we rejoiced to know thai ahe now had 
red the Paradise of ( tod. 

Words of prayer followed, and as the sun was hi 
tting, we each of us took a flower from th( 

dusters, "beheld the sepulchre, and how the body was 1 
then lefl the sacred enclosure, fervently breathing the pr 
u le1 me die the death of the righteous, and let my lasl end 
be like hers." 




SERVICES AT QUINCY 

were held at the Hancock Street Church, Sabbath morning, 
September 10th, appropriate to an occasion so tenderly 
interesting to pastor and people. 

The exercises were opened by singing a hymn selected by 
the choir : 

M other ! though from yonder sky 
Cometh neither voice nor cry, 
Yet we know for thee this day 
Every pain hath passed away. 

Not for thee shall tears be given, 
Child of God, and heir of heaven ! 
For He gave thee sweet release, 
Thine the Christian's death of peace. 

Well we know thy living faith 
Had the power to conquer death, 
As a liviug rose may bloom 
By the border of the tomb. 



Mother ! in that solemn trust 
We commend thee dust to dust ; 
In that faith we wait till, risen, 
Thou shalt meet us all in heaven. 



M I .Mdli I W.. 1 •") 



DISC OURS I. 



ItV Ul • 1 DH MM) P, THWINO. 



John 19: 27. Bbhold thy mothbx. 

There arc few incidents in the" life of our Redeemer more 
deeply affecting than this scene at the cross. We hardly 

know which to admire the more, the maternal or the filial 
: or to tell which suffered the greater pangs, at that 
moment, mother or sou. We know that in the fulfilment of 
Simeon's prophecy, Mary must have endured ineffable agony, 
•he sword pierced through her own soul also." How 
intense must have been her love to this her first-born ! 
Towards the evil and unthankful a mother's love goes out in 
all embracing, all forgiving power ; but how much deeper 
must have been her affection for this "holy thing" born of 
her, alone among her other children pure and undefiled, " the 
son of God." With what fondness, not to say pride, did she 
watch the growth of that noble body and the progress of 
that beautiful life ! We are so nsed to the blemishes and 
weaknesses which attach themselves to a sinful nature and a 
body tainted with corruption, that we can hardly conceive of 
the angelic grace and purity of this, the "fairest of the 
children of men." Mary's love must have been intense, for it 
had not only an exalted object on which to fasten itself, but 
what is still more, it enjoyed a cordial reciprocation. No 
mother on earth ever had such returns of filial affection, and 
hence we may suppose that their fellowship was incompar- 
ably sweet. 

That son was now nailed to the cross ; but as Dr. Adams 
has said, " something stronger than nails held her to the 
cross — a mother's love ; something more excruciating than 
nails and a spear distracted her — the sufferings of her child." 

What a wealth of affection was exhibited in Christ's com- 
mitment of that cherished mother to the beloved disciple ! 
The lesson is for our instruction to-day. Happy are those of 
you who still have a mother to care for and to love. 



16 MEMORIAL OF 

What the loss of one is, none can tell who has never 
experienced the sorrow of separation. The more endearing 
the fellowship, the more complete the reciprocation, the more 
frequent the intercourse, the more vivid will be the realization 
of one's loss. 

Five and thirty years ago, my eyes opened to catch the 
gaze of two loving eyes full of maternal pride and affection. 
From that day till death closed them, or rather these hands 
closed them, those eyes have followed me with unspeakable 
fondness. But twice has the son been away from her side so 
long as three months at a time ; and, for the most part, visits 
have been enjoyed once a week, or oftener. 

The memory of the last sixteen years is very sweet to me. 
It covers the period of preparation for, and enjoyment of, the 
work of the ministry. It was her desire from the first that I 
should choose this work. After thirteen years of school-boy 
life she with disappointment saw me choosing the business 
of a merchant. After two years and more, when those steps 
were retraced, she rejoiced to see me leave the paths of 
money-getting — already promising success — for the less 
lucrative but holier employment of preaching Christ crucified. 
The memory of this portion of my life and hers is also 
grateful to review, because assured by her that I have been 
of real service to her. I refer not to physical comfort merely, 
but to peace of mind. For instance, she confessed at one 
time that she had always looked with dread on death, and 
felt the bondage of fear, till after the subject was put by me 
in a new and less repulsive light, about two years ago, since 
which that fear no longer troubled her. She now has finished 
her course and enjoys in heaven the nobler ministrations of 
Christ, the author of her salvation. 

Finished ! 

A life well rounded and complete, full of years and ripe in 
fruitage, and a character to whose natural grace and sweet- 
ness were added the charms of a renewed soul united to 
Christ. The departure of one so ripe for heaven is not a fit 
occasion for lamentation and tears. Xo ! 

" the Thracians wisely gave 

Tears to the birth-couch, Triumph to the grave ! " 



mks. (.i;\< i. \v. iiiwin... 17 

too, may we rejoice ; for it is not tin- Christian, but 
death, that di 

When Isabella Graham parted with her eldest daugl 
haying listened to the hymn which the departing Bainf sung 
till death closed the son--, and having Been the flight of tie- 

Spirit from the body, she raised her c\«> and hand 

1 dming, in the triumph of faith, ' w I wish you 
joy , my darling!* 1 then took refreshment and retired to rest. 

Such quiet trust and joyful faith we are permitted to id 18- 

trate and enjoy. It" -lory and immortality are the portion of 
this dear departed one, why should we mourn ? 

Tha sketch of hei life is omitted, being the same in SUl 

given. 

1 1 ar friends, I present this sketch, not to gratify pride or 
curiosity, but to honor both the memory of the sainted 
dead, and the grace of God in which she so richly shared. 
Being dead, she yet spcaketh. Let me briefly notice two 
thoughts suggested. One is, the irresistible power wxel<l><l by a 
i mother. The consistent, exemplary life of a parent, 
ially that of a mother, is a power second to none in the 
whole range of human influences. Sophistry cannot baffle 
it, argument cannot gainsay it, time cannot obliterate it. An 
infidel once tried to seduce a young man from the Christian 
practices taught him by a Christian mother. He argued, he 
laughed at him ; but in vain, for though the young man 
could not answer his objections, he knew that the religion 
his mother lived, and by which in her trials she was 
sustained, must be divine. His language was, ,4 The Bible 
does that for her which infidelity never could do, and by 
the grace of God, I will abide by the words that my mother 
taught me." 

Another young man. who felt himself to be very wicked, 
expressed his appreciation of a consistent life in these 
singular words. Comparing his mother with another lady 
who was a lover of pleasure rather than a lover of God, he 
I, k4 I am a sad, ungodly dog myself, but I would not, for 
all the world, be the son of an irreligious mother." i 
then, Behold a Mother, as the centre of an irresistible 



18 MEMORIAL OF 



undying influence. Live, Mothers and Fathers, so that the 
image which you project on the minds of your children shall 
be such as you will not fear to have eternity make indelible ! 
Live so that they will rise up and call you blessed. Rest not 
till every one of your household is an heir of eternal life ; 
nor then be content till you behold their sanctified energies 
consecrated to the Lord that bought them, reproducing in 
their life and labors his glorious spirit of consecration. 

Again. Let me say to those tvho still have an object on 
which they may expend their filial affection, Behold thy 
mother ! You may not have her long on earth to love. The 
remembrance of unkindness or neglect biteth at last * ' like 
a serpent and stingeth like an adder." In reference to the 
departed, I can say with another already quoted, " I see 
many things which I should not have said or done, and many 
things which I could have done better ; but while I say this, 
I must say, injustice to the grace of God, that as I stood 
over that parent's coffin, and when I left her in the tomb, I 
could not find in my recollections anything with which to 
reproach myself as an unkind and undutiful child. This is 
all, which, as a sinner, I dare to say, for the heart is deceit- 
ful above all things ; but I must add that my mother's kind 
expressions of gratitude and love for any conduct which she 
was pleased to regard as dutiful, are now the richest treasures 
in my memory. Her face towards me is not made by my 
conscience to wear any coldness. I did not despise her 
when she was old." 

Am I addressing any, who, forgetful of the undischarged 
debt of obligation they owe their mother, regard her wishes 
as wearisome restraints, her wants as burdens, and her 
infirmities, it may be, intolerable ? I have known sons who 
were impatient of a mother's gentlest control, and whose 
disrespect stung her sensibilities most deeply. I have seen 
daughters, by their frivolity and wantonness, their silly love 
of display, their loose and roving habits, planting thorns in a 
mother's pillow. Oh reflect, if any such hear me, how 
remorseful your memories will be, when you see those now 
pleading eyes closed in death ; the hands that long ministered 
to you, folded across a motionless breast, and the lips that 



MR8. GBACE W. THWINO. 



long your infant lullabies, soothed you in sickness, prayed 
ou in danger and counselled you so wisely, sealed in the 
ave ! 
Sincere may be your sorrow then, loud your protestations 

oi' love, still louder your call for forgiveness, hut it will he 

unavailing! During remaining life, and, unless God pardon, 

throughout eternity you will drag about with you like a 

y chain these remorseful but ineffaceable memories. 

And finally, beloved friends, let us all come more com- 
pletely under the powers of the world to come. Time is fleet- 
ing. Our parents, our children and our friends we shall not 
have with us long. Heboid, then, thy Mother, thy Father, 
thy Child or thy Neighbor. To-day he is, to-morrow all 
that remains of him here may be claimed by the grave. 
Eternity — to some of us, it may be — is just at hand. Let 
every plan be adjusted to this great truth. Let every act 
receive a complexion from it. Let our social duties be dis- 
charged with reference to it, in the fear and love of God. 
Then sweet indeed will be our family fellowships here, and 
unutterably sweet our meeting above ! 



IN MEMORIAM. 

Died at Quincy, Thursday, Sept. 21, 1865, Herbert, 
youngest child of Rev. Edward P. and Susan M. Thwing. 
Taken ill the day of his grandmother's death, lie died on the 
same day of the week, and on the same day of her funeral, 
three weeks later, was laid by her side. The oldest and the 
youngest of the family were not long separated. Two sum- 
mers passed over his head, and he was taken to the land 
where endless summers smile. Rev. J. H. Means, of Dor- 
chester, offered prayer at the house, 10 o'clock, Saturday 
morning, and the body was carried to the Chapel at Mount 
Auburn, where, at 2 P. M., Rev. S. P. Fay conducted the 
funeral exercises. After reading selections of Scripture, he 
offered brief but touching remarks in reference to the circum- 
stances of the departure of this cherished child, who passed 
from his father's study, where his last days were spent, peace- 
fully and joyfully to his Father's house above, to be wel- 
comed by one but lately admitted there, and by Him who 
said, *' Suffer little children to come unto me, and forbid them 
not." After prayer, the remains were taken to their already 
consecrated resting place. Standing over his lowly bed, a 
few voices, led by that of his grandfather, sung to the tune 
of " Ward " the following hymn : 

As the sweet flower that scents the morn, 

But withers in the rising day ; 
Thus lovely was this infant's dawn, 

Thus swiftly fled its life away. 

It died ere its expanding soul 

Had ever burned with wrong desires, 
Had ever spurned at heaven's control, 

Or ever quenched its sacred fires. 

It died to sin, it died to cares, 

But for a moment felt the rod : 
O mourner! such, the Lord declares, — 

Such are the childreu of our God. 



